Creating a place of solace...

Did you know that the scripture talks about "the home" over 600 times? I didn't. Well, not until I was Googling ways to help create a more peaceful home.  In my mind, the only significant scripture about being a HomeMAKER was that seemingly unattainable Proverbs 31 woman that I don't even want to start comparing myself to...
I don't know about you but I've come to realize that the state of my home (bedroom, kitchen, even my van) is often a direct correlation to how I am feeling internally. The more at peace and centered I feel, the more motivated I feel to create a stress-free place of relaxation and solace at home. When I am feeling stressed, overwhelmed or even depressed I tend to avoid the mundane every day chores and the more chaos around me the more chaotic I feel inside.  I know it's a vicious cycle and you would think that the direct correlation of the two would cause me to work constantly to create a peaceful habitat but if I'm being honest I don't always succeed.   A couple of my downfalls are: (1) I don't particularly like to clean.  I can keep things basically "picked'up" but hate the deep cleaning (2) I'm a procrastinator --- even if I have a good intention of doing a cleaning project, I will find other things "to-do" and never get to the original project (3) I'm an organized STACKER...yep, you read that right...a STACKER.  That means I keep organized stacks of paper, mail, coupons, and other things that only I know what/where they are.  It's not a good method and is a habit I am adding to my list of things I want to change. I really want to work on creating a peaceful, relaxing and happy space that my family can feel comfortable in.
All this reflection was brought about by my ONE accomplished task yesterday (nope, once again it was not working toward my weight goals lol)...I cleaned mine and my husband's bedroom.  I mean I actually picked up all the stacks of stuff - the pile of clean clothes, the duffle bag I keep at instant access in case I need it (or at least that sounds like a good excuse), a couple cookbooks, choir music and cds from our Christmas production and various other papers I might need for something -- I finally moved it out of our room or found a place for them. Now don't get me wrong, some of the items are probably not in the proper place. Some just got moved to our home office and out of the bedroom BUT at least the bedroom is now a more peaceful place.  I lit a couple candles and looked around thinking "wow, it really is peaceful."
So, now comes my additional project for 2014.  I want to create an environment in my home that is a place of refuge and peace for my family...not one of disorganization or chaos.  I'm not having grandeur dreams that I will have the perfectly clean home - that will probably never happen - but I will make a new attempt to change the energy of my home through a more direct and conscious effort of doing away with the STACKS and finding a place for everything.
I would love to hear YOUR ideas of how you maintain order and peace in your home. What tricks do you use and what has made a difference in organization?  And if you, like me, would like to make changes for a peacefully and more orderly habitat...how are you going to start?  For me, I'm cleaning out the medicine closet and kids bathroom today...that's my plan so let's see how it goes...


Here are a few links to tips on creating a peaceful home I found in my research:
Creating a Peaceful Home
Tips on creating a Peaceful Home
4 Steps to a Peaceful Home

Accountability? ummmm...okay

So, as you know when I began writing this blog the beginning of January, I stated that I was doing it [partly] as an accountability. Well, the definition of "accountability" (according to Bing dictionary) is being "responsible to someone or for something" and what I've come to realize is that is for the GOOD and the BAD.  It would be very easy to write a blog every day showing all the good things that are going on and positive changes that are happening, but without the honesty of the not-so-perfect moments it's not really being accountable.
I had a friend tell me this morning that when she reads my blog it helps her to feel normal (basically that she's not alone in the situations she faces or feelings she has).  That was one of my goals of doing this.  I wanted to show other women that they are not alone in their not perfect life. We all feel like failures at times or don't follow through with goals but we can move past that...So, here's ME being accountable.
I have not accomplished my health goals for this past week.  I don't mean I haven't done everything I set out to do...I mean I've done NOTHING!  Nada! Not one single thing to move toward a healthier lifestyle (except download an App counting down to the 5K I verbally agreed to do April 5th).  The only step I have taken is getting on the scale a week ago to see how bad it was (and one would think the number I saw on the scale would've catapulted me straight into the gym, Weight Watchers, Curves or any other possible weight management facility, BUT Nope NOT ME).  I've not even so much as increased my water intake.  Now to my credit (or to make a really really good excuse), over the past week I have been really focused on baking cakes for a fundraiser for my upcoming missions trip to Costa Rica. And baking 20+ cakes takes a lot of time.  I can do a great job of justifying why I haven't done anything due to that but the truth is - it takes those cakes 1-1/2 hours to bake and I could've done a lot of squats or power walking during that time, but like I said I DIDN'T!
Now here's the thing...does me not taking any steps toward my health goals mean I wasn't really serious when I set those goals?  No, I don't think so. Does it mean that my goals are a lost cause and I should just give up?  Once again...No, I don't think so.  I know what I need to do.  In my head I know it's what needs to happen and I still plan to take the steps needed.  But, I'm forgiving myself for not accomplishing EVERYTHING I set out to accomplish this past 10 days.  I'm choosing to look at what I did right and the things I did accomplish For example: I raised ALL the money needed to pay for my missions trip...and believe me that's a miracle in itself.  I also made sure my family had a hot dinner every night, that they had clean clothes every day (ok, so that one still needs a little work), I told my husband and kids I love them every day and I successfully blogged most days since beginning.  My week didn't end up perfect -- my house isn't spotless -- and if I get back on the scale today I'm sure it hasn't moved.  But, I have TODAY and what I don't accomplish today I can do TOMORROW.  I will continue to be accountable because it will move me in the direction I'm choosing to go. I will continue to succeed and I will continue to fail but I WILL continue to MOVE FORWARD!
I encourage you to seek your own accountability --- let someone know your goals and plans so you can go the direction YOU choose to go too...

You gotta have FAITH!!!

I posted this a couple years ago on our church's women's blog-site.  Some of you may have read it but it is a great reminder that I read occasionally to try to refocus when I'm stressed out or worrying about situations in my life...

Some time ago I was lying in bed thinking (okay – so some people might call it worrying) about some challenging events that were occurring in my life and the thought came to me . . . “I can choose to live in my circumstances or I can choose to live in (or by) my FAITH.” It was such an overwhelming thought that I actually reached over and emailed it to myself from my cell phone so that I wouldn’t forget the next morning. Living by FAITH is a choice and one only I can make every day! 2 Corinthians 5:7 says we “walk by faith and not by sight” – the NIV actually says we “LIVE by faith” and I have to tell you there are times when the view of the circumstances I am facing blinds me to the path of faith I should be walking on. Hebrews 11:1 says “FAITH is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Another way the Amplified Bible says it is that “FAITH is perceiving as a real fact what is not revealed to the senses.” To say that we have faith and to actually LIVE by it are two completely things. I can say that I have faith and that I believe that God is going to do all He says He is going to do BUT when I’m actually faced with the circumstances of life, how does my inner (wo)man actually respond to those situations – especially when none of my 5 senses can sense a change around me? Well, that’s where our FAITH actually takes over. Because I am living by the things I cannot see with my physical eyes or touch with my hands, I am leaving my situation in the all-knowing, more than capable hands of the very God who created ME and has known me before my very conception (Psalms 139:13) . It’s hard to actually walk out that belief sometimes but as Christians that is the hope we have. It is the hope that the God of the Universe has plans for me to prosper and not to harm me but plans to give me a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11) and I have to rest in the fact that no matter what is going on around me, He knows and He cares and He will walk through the fire with me. I hope that just as I’ve had to do this week, you will give yourself a Faith-check . . . are you living today in your circumstances or are you choosing to believe that God is in control and LIVE in your FAITH??? The choice is YOUR’S!

Blessings in disguise!

Note: This is NOT my sink!!! 

Have you ever heard the saying "be careful what you pray for because what you pray FOR today you may be praying ABOUT tomorrow" or "be careful what you wish for"? Sometimes we can find ourselves wishing for things we don't have or resenting things we do have. Or we may not be thankful for thing things we DO have and be envious of what we think others have. It can be a viscous cycle to find yourself in. 

Unfortunately, there are times I find myself complaining about certain things I have to do around the house -- laundry, dishes, bathrooms, beds --- you know, the housework stuff.  I mean, I love to have a clean house but I hate to clean. I love to cook but I hate washing the dishes.  I think I've discovered that I'm a goal oriented person.  If I have a project, I want to have a deadline and be done with it.  It's not like that with maintaining a house with kids and a husband.  The project is never done.  I thought about this poem I found several years ago and decided to post it.  It's a great reminder - at least for me it is.  Maybe it will help you put some things in perspective in your life like it does for me.  We have so much to be thankful for and although it comes in unexpected packages we should still see the gifts around us!!! 

Thankful Prayer

Lord, thank you for this sink of dirty dishes; we have plenty of food to eat.

Thank you for this pile of dirty, stinky laundry; we have plenty of clothes to wear.

And I would like to thank you, Lord, for those unmade beds; they were so warm and comfortable last night. I know that many have no bed.

My thanks to you, Lord, for this bathroom, complete with all the splattered mirrors, soggy, grimy towels and dirty lavatory; they are so convenient.

Thank you for this finger-smudged refrigerator that needs defrosting so badly; it has served us faithfully for many years. It is full of cold drinks and enough leftovers for two or three meals.

Thank you, Lord, for this oven that absolutely must be cleaned today. It has baked so many things over the years.

The whole family is grateful for that tall grass that needs mowing, the lawn that needs raking; we all enjoy the yard.

Thank you, Lord, even for that slamming screen door. My kids are healthy and able to run and play.

Lord, the presence of all these chores awaiting me says You have richly blessed my family. I shall do them cheerfully and I shall do them gratefully.

Amen

I love cheap pizza!

FACT:  I love cheap pizza!!  NO, not the "hey this is on sale 2/$10" kind. I mean the 99 cent pizza that you can sometimes get on sale for 79 cents.  You know the thin crusted, sometimes cardboard consistency el cheapo pizza that barely has enough "cheese" to cover the sauce.  Yep! That's the one!  Yes, I know it's not good for me.  And yes, I know it's full of all kind of preservatives and probably fake meat and cheese, And of course I know that it's nothing like the homemade kind or the celebrated New York style but I LOVE it!!!! Even though it's not the BEST I still love it.
That got me thinking...why do I love cheap pizza so much?  Why would I ever settle for such a sub-par product when there are so many others out there that are so much better?  And I think I figured it out. There's something about the taste and maybe even the consistency that transport me back to times in my life that were so simple and carefree.  Back to elementary school and the days of square pepperoni pizza with whole kernel corn and peaches...maybe to my college cafeteria with the same square pizza but dipped in French dressing (yes, it sounds weird but it was good at the time).  And then I started thinking about other areas of my life where I settle for mediocre, possibly even cheap versions of the best simply because they make me feel comfortable.  Unfortunately, I was able to identify several.  I can look back over my life and recognize times when I didn't move forward simply because it took me out of my comfort zone.  It's so easy to just stay comfortable and not risk anything even when we know the possibilities are endless and the outcome could be so much more.  We stay in a job we hate, we keep relationships that aren't healthy, we don't risk building new relationships just because staying in the comfort seems better than moving into the unknown.  It can occur in all areas of our life.
2014 is shaping up to be a year of change in my life.  Although I know I'm not in the place I want to be, I pray I am allowing God to move me into the places He wants me to be.  It may be a slow process and there may still be times I'm tempted to settle for cheap pizza. However, I truly want to trust HIM and follow HIM into the depths HE wants to take me.  I want the mac-daddy super ultra supreme slice of the pizza and I know that only comes with giving up the cheap, cardboard version that brings me comfort.
It's time to step out of our comfort and find the best that HE desires to give us!!!!

Your unique recipe...

1/2 lb. butter, 6 eggs, 3 cups sugar, 3 cups flour, and 1 tsp. vanilla....
That's the basic recipe to make pretty much any type of pound cake.  Look in any cookbook and chances are you will find these 5 ingredients (with maybe a slight variation of the amounts).  However, whenever you add one additional ingredient -- say, cream cheese, or coconut, or sour cream -- you have a completely different cake.  Yes, chances are it still looks similar (unless you bake like I do and every cake turns our looking different), but when you slice it and take a bite each additional ingredient changes the flavor or texture just enough to make it unique...not just a plain pound cake.
That's an analogy I was hit with over the past couple of days during my baking marathon.  I have cake #5 baking in the oven right now (with 10 to go) and although I've used the same ingredients for all of the first 4, they have all come out looking slightly different -- just like we are!  We are all human...we are wives...moms...daughters...sisters...WOMEN!  We are all basically made of the same ingredients (when you get down to the biology of it).  We were all formed in our mother's womb -- fearfully and wonderfully made --- but it's those ADDITIONAL INGREDIENTS that makes us all slightly unique. It makes us who we are...our hair color, our waste size, our love of pets, our  personality...all that we are not the same as anyone around us.  Just adding one ingredient to our life has altered who we have become and who we are becoming.
It's so easy to look at the circumstances of our life and resent situations that have happened.  Maybe we have been hurt by friends, family or a spouse...maybe we've experienced loss that seems unbearable...maybe abuse has forever changed our perception of those around us.  There are so many ingredients that are constantly being added to our basic make-up.  But, here's the cool thing about each finished product...  Just like my cakes where each ingredient just makes my basic recipe a better cake -- every life experience you have walked through or are walking through is making you a better person. It's making you a better wife, mom, daughter or sister.  It's making you stronger and pointing you to a dependence on the Master Baker...our Creator.  None of us are perfect and we don't live perfect lives but if we allow him to use our additional ingredients for HIS glory then there is no doubt that the finished product will always be better than the basic recipe.
Be YOU!  Be an original!  Be all HE has designed YOU to be!!!

A new season...a new day!

It's a new season...
Well, 2013 is now a chapter that has come to a close in this story we call life.  It was filled with ups and downs, triumphs and failures, happy and sad times.  We faced new challenges and made happy memories.  Now it's 2014 and I am looking toward the future with GREAT Expectation!  I don't know exactly what the next year will hold for me (or my family) but I do know that I have never wanted to hold onto Jeremiah 29:11 (For I know the plans I have for you says the Lord...plans to prosper you...to give you a hope and a future) more than I do right now. As a mom, wife, friend, minister and woman I have many shortcomings.  I face doubts and fears and am having to learn daily to walk out FAITH instead.  There are times I am successful and times I am not.  I think that is true for all of us.
I have decided that to track this next chapter is a great way to hold myself accountable and to see the great changes that I know are going to be brought about.  I am choosing to chase the dreams God has placed in my heart and becoming a better person (mom...wife...friend...woman) than I have been in the past.  I want to be healthier and happier!  AND I want that for YOU!  I would love for you to come along on this journey with me.  It will take some transparency and lots of getting out of our comfort box BUT TOGETHER we can do it!
I started my morning by becoming accountable for a Health Goal I need to attain.  It wasn't a pleasant experience but it was one I knew I had to take (and to be honest with myself about).  I know we risk much in honesty but in order to gain much, you have to take that risk.
So, here's to a new chapter...a happy chapter...a healthy chapter and a MOVING FORWARD chapter.
Let's choose to only look back to learn from our experiences.  Let's choose to continue to MOVE FORWARD, walking in the destiny we have been called.
I'm ready to GO...are you????